Frequently Asked Questions about Memories


Verses on Memories - Prov. 3:5-8; Isa. 26:3; 65:16-19; John 17:17; Rom. 12:2; 2 Cor. 10:4-5; Eph. 4:23; Phil. 3:12-14; 4:8-9; Col. 3:10; Tit. 3:5; Heb. 12:3; 1 Pet. 1:13


How do deal with stuffed secrets that I haven’t dealt with?

Please read chapters 8, 9, 10 in Hope for the Brokenhearted: Biblical Solution for Survivors of Abuse and Rape. You do not have to rehearse the actual events of the abuse in your mind to let it out or to heal from it. You deal with the issues of abuse in generalities. You deal with the issue that you were sexually violated. You don't bring up all the details of what happened when you were violated. Ask yourself what is the standing in Christ of a person who has been sexually violated? It is no different from someone who hasn't been sexually violated. I think part of the problem is that you are thinking you are less of a person because of what someone did to you or that you are different in Christ than anyone else and that just is not true. Yes, what you went through is emotionally painful. To let it out means to come to the point where you can openly and unashamedly say I was violated but that was the past and now I am a loved child of my Father in heaven. Don't try to hide and suppress the past. Use it to display the power and love of Christ. With Christ's power you can overcome. With His love you can stand up boldly and say Christ's death on the cross has made me clean therefore I can boldly stand before the throne of grace. Letting it out means facing what you have believed about what happened to you and what you think of yourself and comparing that with what God says. When you confess that you have been believing a  lie about yourself and under estimating the power and completeness of Christ's death on the cross and start believing the completeness of His death as it applies to you personally, you are on the road to healing. You have been trying to kill the abuse and feelings yourself. You are to take it out of yourself, give it to God, and you die to the old nature that is believing the lies and you don't respond to the feelings based on Satan' lies. Your life is hidden in Christ. You need to believe you are victor in Christ. Christ has made you whole positionally. You need to believe and act upon that truth. Study the scriptures on who you are in Christ. Memorize them. Quote them when you are tempted to believe Satan's lies.

As you bring up these stuffed memories to deal with them, forgiving of your abuser will lessen the emotional pain.


What do I do about new memories?
New memories are always traumatic. Your emotions rise to the level as if you were reliving it. This is normal under the circumstance. To help you ease the trauma, remember these things before, during and after the memories surface:
1 Jesus’ death on the cross covers everything that happed to you when you trust Christ as Savior.
2 The memory does not change your status with God.
3 The memory doesn't change anything about what really did happen.
4 It is in the past, it is not happening now.
5 Having flashbacks is not a sin and does not make you unclean.
6 God still loves you.
7 You have been forgiven of all your sin, past, present and future sins.
8 Having the memory doesn't make you a bad person.
Sometimes part of the healing process involves remembering repressed memories so they can come to the surface and be dealt with. This is a stage and it does pass. The length of time it takes to get through this stage varies. Then again for you it may be a one time thing and it is over. I can not say. If God is going to allow you to go through these memories, He then believes that with His strength you are able to handle it (1 Cor.
10:13). If these memories continue for a while, you will be better off when they are finished than before they started.

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